Satan Gives Commencement Address at St. Sincerus

Craig Carter records a lovely satire about  “Satan Gives a Commencement Address at St. Sincerus.”  Craig hosts The Politics of the Cross Resurrected.  Craig teaches theology and ethics at Tyndale University in Toronto.  He believes that theology is “done from and for the Church and is for the people of God, not for an academic elite alone.”  Here’s the satire.  Reformation Anglicanism is beginning to appreciate the need, role and importance of good, old fashioned, biting satire.    See: http://politicsofthecrossresurrected.blogspot.com/2012/05/satan-gives-commencement-addrss-at-st.html. 

Satan Gives Commencement Address at St. Sincerus         

In the wake of Georgetown University's decision to invite Kathleen Sibellius (best known as the persecutor of Catholic and Evangelicals, as well as other faith communities,) to speak at its Commencement Ceremony recently, the Catholic Phoenix decided that mockery would be the most appropriate response.

So it announced that St. Sincerus University, the 84th largest Catholic university in the US, has invited Satan to be its Commencement speaker. (Today's liberal Catholic universities do not make satire easy.)

In a move already denounced by Catholic bishops & other leading religious conservatives, St. Sincerus University, the nation’s 84^th largest Catholic university, has invited Satan to deliver its commencement speech later this month. Also known as the Prince of Darkness, Lucifer, &, more popularly, the Devil, Satan is a divisive figure among Catholics & other Christians. Several Catholic universities have upset religious conservatives in recent years by inviting controversial figures to deliver commencement speeches, as when the University of Notre Dame, the nation’s largest Catholic University, invited President Barack Obama, who supports a woman’s right to abortion, in 2009. The invitation to Satan by SSU president Fr. Thad Despereaux comes at a time when many Catholics are highly critical of the Obama administration’s attempts to reform health care, which some claim would force Catholic institutions to violate their Church’s teachings by providing contraceptives as part of their health insurance plans. Fr. Despereaux, in comments made to the Daily Sham, SSU’s student newspaper, said that having Satan on campus gives bold witness to a central Catholic principle that God can be found in all things. “The continuing politicization of the faith indicates just how important it is for us to build bridges,” Fr. Despereaux said. “Our whole mission as a university is to bring people together. Satan is badly misunderstood by many people, & we hope to show our graduates that stereotypes, & the hatred they engender, have no place on a Catholic campus. As Catholics we are to hate hate.”

On-campus reactions at SSU have been favorable, as faculty & students alike have applauded the university’s open-mindedness in issuing the invitation. Dr. Sophia Greengrass, Director of the university’s Wiccan Institute, called the invitation a brave attempt to promote the university’s academic integrity in the face of “fascist attempts by the male hierarchy to impose its limited & limiting dogmas,” . . .

Read the rest here.

Now, Dr. Satan's speech is up. Here is the beginning.

Thank you. (loud applause) Thank you all very much. Thank you, Fr. Despereaux. Please, folks (continued applause), please be seated. A little restraint every now & then. . . (laughter).
Seriously, this is quite an honor for me. I can’t say an unexpected honor, as this invitation was in the cards for some time now. And this despite all the non-attention I’ve received from many of your Catholic intellectuals; wasn’t it your own Fr. Cheever in Ancient Near Eastern Studies who said in your student paper that I don’t exist? (laughter). He’s not alone in thinking that, though I take it that after we got to know each other a bit better last night he has a different take on things. Talk about an ashen countenance when I discussed my background! Suffice it to say that he knows a bit more about ancient mythology & sacrifice than he did before we spoke. It really is too bad he can’t be here today, as he’s much in my thoughts, as are all the fine academics at this institution. Much of the work you do is directly responsible for my being here today, & I am much pleased by it.

To honor the graduates of St. Sincerus, I will focus my remarks on the creative gifts God has so richly blessed you all with, as well as on your sacred responsibility to nurture those gifts, despite the heavy costs. As you know, you live in a world in which the majority of people seek to restrain, to control, & even to deny the creativity of the few. Isn’t it a sad irony that such a gift, which can help you to make & remake your world, & which is an expression of God’s image within you, so badly frightens the unimaginative?

Read the rest here.

Go here to Catholic Phoenix to read the Satanic rest. An honorary degree was conferred upon the Prince of Darkness, and The American Catholic has obtained a copy:

At the 164th Commencement, The May Exercises, The University of Saint Sincerus Confers the degree of Doctor of Laws, honoris causa, on His Infernal Majesty, Satan, whose historic Fall from grace opened a new era in a Universe since divided between God and His critics. A community organizer in Hell who honed his advocacy for the Damned on the streets of Dis, he now organizes a larger community, bringing to Creation a renewed angelic, albeit Fallen, dedication to diplomacy and dialogue with all souls interested in the common good. Through his willingness to engage with those who disagree with him, especially God, and encourage people of faith to work together to bridge the gap between abstractions such as “Good” and “Evil”, he is inspiring this Universe to heal its divisions of religion, culture, race and politics in the audacious hope for a brighter tomorrow.

On Satan, Lucifer, Beelzebub and all the many other names by which Man has known him, of the City of Dis, Hell, this degree is duly conferred this 12th day of May, 2012 CE.